Monday, March 2, 2009

toliet water and tattoos

2 stories today, about you guessed it: toliet water and tattoos

we'll start with the uber-gross one....
this morning peanut is snoozing in his crib while the boys eat breakfast. bubba tells me ''i gotta pee'' so we trek up the stairs. naturally, pooks follows because the earth may stop spinning if he doesn't get to flush the potty. we're in the bathroom and i'm trying to get bubba's pull up off of him so that he can pee, and so we can put his real underwear on him. (he only wears pull-ups overnight) and pooks is playing with the bath toys. no biggie, he's allowed to do that. so i get bubbas pull-up, pulled down and he does his thing. as i'm pulling his Cars undies up, i see pooks out of my peripheral vision spitting something out...

i look all the way over to find him using the bath cup to DRINK TOILET WATER!!! i about threw up. i admit, i lost my cool mommy edge and freaked. i'm draggin him to the sink, going "no! no! no! no! no!" as i throw the damn cup in the sink, start furiously splashing water in his mouth and scrubbing his hands. i brushed his teeth, threw the tooth brush away and ripped off his shirt which was either splashed with sink or toliet water--when it doubt, throw it out! and do you know what he's doing this whole time? laughing hysterically. no joke. hysterically. if you personally know us, you know his evil laugh...that's the one he was using.

ugh! i don't know what to do with him. i've tried leaving him out in the hall when bubba pees but he screams and cries enough to wake the neighbors (not to mention his little brother) so i always end up letting him in. the kid is a whack a doodle and i'm not even exaggerating. as auntie michelle realized, he's like the freaking Tasmanian devil!

moving on, second story:

today i am leaning over changing peanuts diaper when bubba tells me, ''mama i see your tattoo." i said something along the lines of "you do? is it pretty?" he replies "uh huh. me have tattoo on me back too." um...no you don't, but sure. i'll play along. "you have a tattoo on your back too?! wow! what's your tattoo of?"...he gets excited and is trying to pull up the back of his shirt and look at the same time ''me tattoo a brown tow-truck...yike tow-mater! see mommy, see?" so i look over and i can't help but smile.

yep he has a tattoo alirght. a brown splotch....the kid is pointing to his birthmark!

i'm laughing out loud at this point. he's just so stinking cute. i tried telling him that his tattoo isn't like mama and dada's that his is a birthmark and that he's had it since he was born. but he just keeps saying ''nooo mommy. {while laughing} its a tow-truck tattoo."

if you say so kiddo. if you say so.

**edited to add: that the toilet water was clean, i mean it wasn't what bubba had just pee'd in. but ask yourself, is toilet water ever really "clean"?***

1 comment:

  1. Even though you had already told me the toilet story, I still felt a little sick reading it again. That kid is crazy!

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